Each week the Eyres post one tried and proven “Parenting Principle” (or sometimes a Marriage Principle) here on this page, and also on social media (Instagram @richardlindaeyre, Facebook @lindarichardeyre, and Twitter @richardeyre). Please follow, and invite your friends to do the same. Each week the brief, quotable parenting principle will appear with several links to articles, podcasts, videos, or radio and television appearances that give more ideas, instruction and inspiration on that principle.
Over the years, the best marriages we have observed seem to have three essential elements: First, an established pattern for communication and conflict resolution, Second, ongoing romance and “dates”, and Third, some spiritual connection and a way to pray or meditate together.
We have also often said that the five best “ingredients” of marriage are the five C’s: Chastity, Courtship, Compatibility, Commitment, and Celebration.
Learn more:
How do I keep my kids close and united over the long term?
Family Traditions and Rituals are the glue that holds families together and gives kids an identity larger than themselves. We all have family traditions, but reviewing them, improving them, and celebrating them is something we can all do better!
For more thoughts and ideas on forming, maintaining, and improving your family traditions:
The Number 1 parenting challenge in America, Europe, and Asia is controlling their children’s use of smartphones and social media, and parents who do not have a specific strategy will not succeed.
Studies show direct parallels between time spent on smartphones and the likelihood of kids’ depression, isolation, anxiety, and even suicide. But the biggest problem is the things excess screen time keeps away from – exercise, the out-of-doors, personal socializing, and a healthy awareness of the real world.
There is no one-size-fits-all parental approach, but those who think it through, discuss it with their kids, and develop a clear set of rules and limits seem to be doing fine, while parents who just “let it happen” usually have addicted kids with worsening problems.
Visit the links below to see practical approaches to this challenge and specific ideas for helping your children to understand the potential for addiction and the need to govern themselves.
The “Autumn” of our lives can be our richest most joyous season. It is the time that our attitude and approach begins to determine both our longevity and our legacy.
Families get truly beautiful when they operate as three generation entities. If you are a baby boomer, these links are for you! If you are a younger parent, send these links along to your parents and invite them to follow us on social media (or teach them what social media is!)
For more on this topic:
The worst time for kids to make choices is in the midst of peer pressure. Parents can create forward-thinking case studies that help children make important decisions in advance—and write them down and commit to them before the peer pressure comes.
We can 8-14-year-old kids anticipate difficult choices about smoking or drugs, about recreational sex or riding with a drunk driver. We can do this by making use of what every child has—a good imagination. Three steps: 1. Get your child a special diary and designate the last pages for “decisions in advance.” 2. Explain that it is better to think things through before they happen so we are not caught off guard. 3. Ask the child what decisions he or she can make now, even though he has not faced them yet—and have him write those decisions in the journal and date and sign each one. 4. Make up stories or case studies about the child a few years out—describe situations where he will face peer pressure to make a bad choice and ask what he will say or do.
For more on this topic:
Parents need to learn that we give our kids more by giving them less. To eliminate entitlement, start by replacing allowances with a “family economy” that teaches children how to earn, budget, save, and spend wisely.
When we give children money, or buy everything for them, they never feel the sense of real ownership because they did not work or give up anything for what they have. Thus, they do not value it or take care of their money or their things. It is not difficult to set up a family economy with a family bank in which kids have interest-bearing accounts with checkbooks and deposit slips; and to establish chores or responsibilities for which they are paid. They are then in a position to buy the things they want rather than beg for them, and to learn through hands-on experience how to save, and budget and even how to give to good causes. For a complete overview of how to set up such a system, visit the links
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Kids who know things about their grandparents and great-grandparents—who understand their family narrative and where they came from—have a stronger sense of Identity and greater resilience. Carefully crafted “Ancestor Stories” can become your children’s favorite bedtime stories.
For more on this topic:
